#the epilogue is randomly in first person

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads // twitter thread  

Road of the Lost

YA fantasy adventure,

a brownie girl raised by a hag discovers that she’s been under a spell hiding her identity all her life

so she travels through the fey otherworld to find her true self, and uncovers the mystery of the rulers of the kingdoms

[cosmowgyral]

If it's not a bother, can you list some sweet things Jude has done to Kate even before they were lovers and when they were lovers?

Yeah sure! I've jotted down the ones I recall.

The first instance happens when Jude and MC were locked in his office at night by the syndicate members after a brawl. MC basically had a scratch on her cheek and Jude was concerned over that, moving his thumb over it. He said that it might leave a scar. This may not seem sweet enough but we get to see his gentle smile during this conversation. 🥺❤️

The second is when they wake up the next morning and him fixing her bedhair. 😭😭❤️❤️ (The reason why I never miss his good morning wish)

Next is when Jude got beaten up and was lying on the ground smoking and taking a break when MC came. Seeing her, he went ahead and put his head on her lap. (the mid-route CG)

Then in Chapter 19 premium story, MC was crying and he kisses everywhere on her face along with her tears. He said that crying doesn't suit her and and a smiling face is more cute. (save my poor heart)

He also gifted her a pocket watch like his, with a robin engraved at the back.

Now this might not be directly being sweet to her but when Jude left the MC at a town to keep her away from the British military who might be after Jude and her as they ran away from their base, he asked Ellis and then someone else to watch over her from a distance so that she remained unharmed. He even requested Ellis (over a letter, and yes, REQUESTED) to look after her if anything happens to him.

Post dating, in the MLE, it seems like Jude always felt her up to a certain point before missions, and said that he would only do the rest after the mission is over. This is so that she keeps her promise of not dying before him and that way he can 'reward' her.

In the epilogue, he introduces MC to his sister (her grave) as his woman. And while this again might not be Jude being directly sweet to her, this scene was sweet and heartwarming enough to be mentioned.

Jude also touches and kisses her hair strands randomly and I personally LOVE that.

[menofsweaters]

Okay, I finally broke down and read the MHA epilogue leaks and I'm throwing my thoughts at the wall here so they'll get out of my brain. I fully did NOT seek these leaks out, but I was inundated with them all over tumblr, Insta, and even TikTok.

First and foremost, canon genuinely means very little to me. 90% of my enjoyment of MHA comes from fan works, including creating my own AUs and whatnot with friends, so like... canon being bad can't hurt me. I'm also old and have lived through way worse queerbaiting and fandom wars. There's also probably a lot lost in translation that we don't know yet and won't know until the official release. 🤷‍♀️

In no particular order, here is my brain dump on:

Izuocha and shipping in general

- as mentioned above, I don't really care about canon and I don't think ships need to be canon to be meaningful and enjoyable. I'll ship characters who never meet. I'll ship characters from completely different fandoms. Who's gonna stop me? In general, I think the shippers need to stop putting so much emphasis on a particular ship being canon.

- ALL THAT BEING SAID, BKDK was my first MHA ship and it's incredibly important to a lot of people. I think Hori had the opportunity to do something with that relationship that would have been groundbreaking, and he chose not to. He also had the opportunity to simply not focus on any ships and he didn't do that either, soooo... yeah. I think it's okay to be bitter that we still can't have a canon queer ship in shounen. It's reasonable to be disappointed. BKDK and Togachako were the most moving and complex relationships portrayed in the entire manga, in my humble opinion, and it does sting that they got pushed aside.

- I am not a fan of Izuocha, even though I generally like Ochaco. I just find it boring. I'm not enthused by het ships in general, but Izuocha in particular has zero chemistry in my eyes. They're also very similar characters in their mannerisms and personality, and I prefer "opposites attract" type ships that are more dynamic. I prefer Izuku and Ochaco as besties. They went through such similar traumas during the war, being unable to save someone that truly mattered to them, I would prefer to think of this ending as them helping each other move past their PTSD to rekindle a closer friendship.

- ALL OF THAT BEING SAID, while the chapter did not explicitly pair up ANY couples (except apparently Mushroom Girl and Vantablack? which is?? cute but random???), it's definitely implied that Izuocha is pursuing a romantic relationship. Feel free to tell yourself something different but it is what it is.

The hero rankings and other random plot crumbs

- the rankings also felt so incredibly random to me?? Best Jeanist dropping below Mt. Lady? what??

- good on Lemillion being number one though, I always imagine him in the top spot and I think the MHA world needs a hero like that to lift their spirits after the war. It makes sense that he's popular.

- also makes sense that Shouto is number two but wtf do you mean AIR CONDITIONING HERO

- so many of the updated character designs on the adult heroes are BAD, but Jeanist looks slick

- they changed Shinsou's hero name? for why? and gave him a bad haircut??

- absolutely no mention of how Hawks and All Might are working to revamp the hero rankings system, do not accept this

- Mirio is one of my favorite characters but his scene was weird af

- so many inconsistencies in the art style and messaging

- people randomly saying ominous things with no follow through like "heroes won't be around for much longer" or whatever

- I saw someone mention an implication that Bakugou is married to a woman but I didn't find any sign of that in the leaks, so I think that's fake. I know everyone is upset about Dynamight being number 15, and I agree that's too low, but that irritation is low on my list of grievances.

- the whole conversation between Baku and Deku about joining his agency was confusing and unfulfilling? I get why Deku would say no to being a sidekick, but I also don't feel like that's what Bakugou was offering, and they had the conversation in the car with Kirishima... just awkward. Which segues into my next talking point

Horikoshi's writing as a whole

- I think you can easily track the degradation of Hori's writing from the vigilante Deku arc to now. It's disjointed, confusing, often strays from established themes, and meanders around on weird tangents. It's... not great. It's not awful, but not great, especially for an epic climax/epilogue. Which is fine! He's a human being, not a content machine! But I think it's fair for fans to be disappointed that the writing has gone downhill, especially since the art has improved and become much more dynamic and interesting at the same time.

- in my view, it's incredibly easy to see that Hori lost his passion and was completely burnt out on MHA as we approached the end. The writing reflects a desire to wrap up everything quickly. Vital details are written in text rather than shown on the page. Storylines and themes are abandoned. Characters die, fail, or excel completely off screen. Hori spends more screen time and puts more emphasis on random side characters (see: Dai and the figure escaped a basement and was saved by that grandmother) rather than main characters, probably because it would be too difficult to give better endings to the main characters.

- you can also see the difference between the complex symbolism and plot points set up since the very beginning in earlier chapters, and all of that complexity and the hopeful vibes are bled away at the end. It's sad, actually.

- I saw an interesting take that this final chapter is Hori trying to make everyone happy - implying Izuocha while leaving BKDK still kind of open, making Deku a teacher AND a hero, listing all of the rankings, etc. and I think this is the theory that makes the most sense to me. He's taking a safer route and trying to please as many fans as possible, while unfortunately disappointing everyone.

- I've also heard that there's pressure from editors or Shounen Jump to have the series end this way, but I don't know about that. I'd think they would want to keep milking this cash cow forever. Maybe that partially explains the lack of queer canonical ships.

- SPEAKING OF WHICH, I've heard consistently from the fanbase that Hori is more progressive and more queer-friendly than other mangaka, but I honestly haven't seen any proof of this. Feels like wishful thinking. I've also hear that he's had other canon gay and trans characters, but the only ones I know of are Magne and Tiger, both characters that are simply implied to be gender nonconforming and maybe trans. But these are also not necessarily great portrayals, even if they are intended to be canon. Maybe there are characters in other works of his that I don't know about.

- maybe I'm jaded, but I also can't shake the assumption that Hori purposefully implied Izuocha at the end because he doesn't like his main characters being seen as gay. We've seen this in many other fathoms. Even if Hori didn't want to make BKDK canon, there are other popular queer ships that could have been given a tiny spotlight if he really wanted to have that representation.

- this is going back to shipping a bit, but Hori had this entire manga to create a meaningful relationship between Izuku and Ochaco and he just... didn't? Instead he literally and figuratively pushed them together at the end? Why not show them going on cute dates and getting closer? Why not a kiss? It just feels like a half-hearted cop-out. Ochaco has more chemistry and more screen time with Toga's ghost living in her brain than with Izuku. I am not exaggerating.

- I think Hori has a major case of "oops I accidentally wrote a powerful queer love story" syndrome (see also: Destiel) and just didn't know what to do with that. There's so little room for chemistry with other characters when you make the entire story about Bakugou and Izuku's relationship. 👀

- I think a lot of fans put Hori on a pedestal and expected perfection, but it turns out he's just one guy and he can't please everyone. I never got the vibe that he was a particularly great writer, and I never got the vibe that he was going to make BKDK canon. I think he (kind of like a certain JKR) created an amazing world and beloved characters, and then really fumbled at the very end when all the pressure was on.

Okay, I think I've cleansed my brain enough of all this.

TLDR: I think Horikoshi's writing has unfortunately been going downhill for a long time and this is the culmination of that. I feel bad for the man because he's probably under so much pressure and so burnt out - he wants to be done. Maybe we would have gotten something better if Hori could take some extended breaks or hand off the manga to someone else.

I'm disappointed about BKDK but more in an "I'm disappointed that we couldn't have this representation in 2024" way than a personal way. I would have preferred no ships. I'll keep enjoying fan content of lots of different ships that aren't canon and you should too! The canon can't hurt you! I hope we get the queer shounen we all deserve one day.

[linka-from-captain-planet]

My favorite thing to do as a background character fan is to commandeer things the devs definitely didn’t MEAN to be characterization and/or storytelling and MAKE them characterization and/or storytelling

Everyone constantly refers to Alfira as a bard, but she only has 12 charisma. She has 16 INT instead. Rolan has wizard stats and Lakrissa has ranger stats, so why doesn't Alfira have bard stats? Is it because she's an apprentice? Why give her these discordant stats in the first place, instead of the flat 10s the other non-combatant tieflings get? Is she a bit old to be an apprentice or is that normal? Was she something else before finding her calling in becoming a bard? How did she know Lihala? Why does she have like 2000 gold worth of reward to give you for saving her not-even-girlfriend (apparently equivalent to 1/5 of the entire net worth of everyone in Baldur's Gate??)?? How the fuck did she get herself and presumably Lakrissa with her into the city!!

Why change Florrick's dress from the flashy-but-modest peacock dress she wore in EA (they later put it on Lucretious) to her current dress, which looks sort of reasonable for a fancy wizard until you notice the huge sheer panels and thong-exposing waist-high thigh splits. Obvi she should have an eye-catching outfit to communicate she's Important, but why THAT outfit? She's not even presented as a character you're supposed to find sexy; she's presented as a stalwart, reserved fed. Her epilogue letter is about being a wet blanket! She doesn't seem like the type of person who would wear such a dress, but clearly she is because she does! Interesting!!

What motivates Lakrissa to say, apropos of basically nothing, with a sad look on her face, "I'm nothing if not cheap."

Why is Quartermaster Talli the only vendor (off the top of my head) you can randomly ask (flirt with) for free shit? Why is the thing she gives you a supply pack? Where did she even get all that awesome shit.

And so on. This is how I keep myself engaged over 500+ hours of playing the same game over and over.

[hamhamki]

Okay, so, you know, as the *previous* Chigaya anti who is now a Chigaya lover; reading his POV changed my mind a lot more. The POV does feel a lot more shorter than it already is because the main story feels pretty short but the POV feel shorter and the progression feels sped up so the pacing is pretty ass.

Tha pacing for the main story is passable, the pov gives some better insight as to why things felt a certain way, but it was still entertaining.

Now that the first season for Chigaya has been completed because there’s surprisingly no epilogue, I will give my thoughts since I went through the stupid idea of talking smack lmao.

To remain somewhat spoiler free for those who are interested in reading, yes, I judged too quickly, I think it's really good. Chigaya and Togo's both feel like an Oopsie compared to the other LI routes, and somehow, that makes it feel a bit more raw.

Chigaya's personality is very polarized, and as someone who was put off by his release in JP, I think his route makes up for his attitude, and I saw liking him a bit more. In Kunihiro's, he was tolerable near the end, but I think his POV and having his own route does make him feel a lot more likable. Of course, the main story still leaves you on the fence since he comes off VERY strong, the POV also gives a lot more as to his thoughts and how he works so I'll admit it. I like Chigaya. Everyone is free to throw tomatoes at me and we most likely saw this coming LMAO.

That being said, now the spoilers will be up ahead as I'll go into deeper detail about what I think!

*CLAPS HANDS*

OKAY! SO!

I'm not great with reviews and I feel like I would have tk be sitting down across from you talking about this game over some boba or something but I digress. There's no format for this but I'll try to be as organized as possible and not sound like this a paper that's due in five minutes and jotting my thoughts randomly.

Length/Pacing

For one, to get it out of the way, once again the story feels a bit short and the POV feels shorter. I feel like we got cheated a bit with the POV especially, I would have liked to see more bonding more interactions with MC and Chigaya. Definitely more of a reaction of the MC finding out he was the IT that humiliated her because I could have sworn it would be at least a little more of a shock but she took it pretty well.

The pacing felt right in places and other times I was like where is this coming from??? The weeks that went by sort of felt like days and you would think that having two parts would have better pacing considering older voltage stories felt just right with only the main story. This kiss didn't seem rushed to me especially if we take in account the POV and how Chigaya feels so that, I could see that.

Characterization

This section I probs will talk a lot cause I do like his characterization here.

As you know, when Chigaya I was RAGING. His "IM SUPERIOR!!" attitude looked more silly and just like why?? And of course, classic Volatge tends to abandon certain characters or just whole titles in general and they do it pretty often and after just getting Togo I felt there was really no need to add another LI for this title. But I think it's safe to say: Chigaya should be the final LI for the title and I do think he's a good character now. He's more annoying in Kunihiro's route and it makes me almost question is the "villain" act that he puts on for the MC in his route the same for Kunihiro's? Either he's still putting on a front for whatever reason in other LIs routes or he's just quirky and thinks very highly of himself.

I'll never forget the part in Kunihiro's where Meguro just goes "Ugh, why am I the only smart person around here!" Because I feel like I'm missing something here considering he's popping up on monitors left and right. Unless maybe that was to build his character and make it seem like Kunihiro has an enemy.

I would like to learn more as to why he's very harsh to people besides that he possibly sees everyone at a certain pedestal that they should be. It was mentioned by Kunihiro that he doubts there will be a team that meets Chigaya's expectations. We'll most likely get more on the second season hopefully considering it delves more into his past because I'm pretty sure there some deepest lore lol. Also quick side note, why do these LIs got to have such tragic family pasts. Like what in the Bambi is going on 😭 They're either dead, fucked up, or never on speaking terms like is Kuranosuke and Shu's family the only ones that are alive and well?

He's aware people dislike him (adverts eyes) and he's aware he's rude up the ass so I wish they dove a little more into why but we'll see. My heart did hurt seeing how alone he truly is with having a robot to rely on and then seeing the MC run the opposite way when she spotted him and how he too felt hurt. He used to people ignoring him or distancing themselves, but to have someone just visibly avoid you. Yeah, that would hurt. Ouch.

Reading Chigaya's POV really saw him in a bigger and better light and getting to his mindset along with his actions definitely changed my view on him. For summary, Chigaya is actually very shy, avoids public situations, tends to keep to himself and sets his goal and himself on very high grounds. The amount of times this man tries to run away from Kunihiro is hilarious. He's like me for real and I sympathize with it a lot because I too think of three different scenarios on how to approach someone and what are three interactions we could have to prepare myself in socializing. What I find funny is he's never successful and someone so boastfully smart as he claims is so clutzy and practically his own villain. Chigaya CROUCHING to get out of Kunihiro's line of sight is so random and unhinged like bro... perspective wise he's going to see you 😭

Also Chigaya, be Kunihiro's friend this man is always coming up to you and he likes you. I instantly saw puppy dog ears on Kunihiro when Chigaya told him he was looking for him. Kunihiro seemed so happy yet Chigaya keeps avoiding the man. Anyway lol

His minor conflicts he has really also bring out his character and make him feel a little more realistic as well. He puts on this front only to be a silly, socially awkward being, sort of like a shield to those around him. One moment I really liked and found funny, a little bit endearing was Chigaya suggesting to a client to use a live feed of plants for the windows because it would be a hassle to take care of live plants, considering that the amount used in the booths were excessive. And after he made the MC upset and couldn't stop thinking about it, he ends up taking one of the live plants home despite not even taking care of his morning glorys he had as a project when he was young. I thought it felt so realistic and that parts really stuck with me a lot.

And usually I'm not a fan of the Clark Kent omg that's a totally different person what an amazing disguise type of scenario, but Voltage gets a star. I will say Chigaya's IT still vs his meta department one don't look that similar imo so it's not Revance Takashi put a hat and you're good to go LMAO And well, it HAS been six years and the MC has tried to lock that memory up so it feels all very valid.

Relationship

One thing I'm slightly confused by, is the progression of Chigaya's crush towards the MC. It does feel like Togo's where it's almost canon? Probably not as canon as Togo's but I feel like it could still most likely be relevant to either a certain extent or however the story plays out? Because does his crush start when the MC declares she'll challenge him and actually isn't put off by his rude and blunt behavior? And is that just the driving force? Maybe I would have just liked to see a little more happen between the two. It's like the main story lacked in some parts but the POV made up for it and vise-versa. That was just some two cents I had because already in the second episode of the POV he's already crushing pretty bad with her.

In the main story, it did come as a shock when he said the MC has a pretty smile with his soft eyes and I'm like damn bro who possessed you? This is pretty early. But know that we know he's been lowkey crushing on her... it makes a lot more sense now.

Not only is he insanely good at what he does to the point he wants to impress the MC but realizes easily when she's been hurt and would hate to be hated on again. The pov does a better job and unraveling that situation as in the main story it makes him look like a jerk but when in reality he just wanted to help not only her out but also have her attention on him but it backfires. And that part I think really helped in making the feelings a bit more believable too within their relationship. After humiliating her years ago, he doesn't want to repeat that same incident and it does have him contemplate to the point he bring home one the plants despite all he said. It was funny, realistic and a nice thing to read.

I would have liked a little more romance I won't lie or maybe something especially from the MC to have a bigger reason to like Chigaya back. It's clear when you receive the first CG upon entering his house, he has some kind of crush on her when she points out that he may like her instead.

Having the close call with her father did make MC come to a better resolve in her feelings towards Chigaya because he was there for her but I needed a bit more to get to that point.

The dynamic between the Mc and Chigaya is great and I'm a sucker for these type of banter relationships because it makes everything feel so much fun and just feels so good haha. I do like how they match each others energy and what Chigaya gives to the MC she'll give back without much hesitation. She feels a lot more stronger and assertive and I like how she's the one to confess her feelings. And then Chigaya just runs off like a weirdo like bro where are you going? I have read a bit of season two with my awful translator and the epilogue for that so far makes me like the MC a bit more in this route because she doesn't back down.

They added a few parts/interactions that weren't in the main story in his pov and I sort of wish we got a few others things between them but I'm just repeating myself at this point.

This is already so long and I'm tired but I'll probably share some more thoughts whenever loool but can we just say how Kunihiro is a menace too because he helped Chigaya have the production dept run around. I also love the fact that Chigaya isn't the villain it's Kunihiro because all Chigaya did was suggest things to him and Kunihiro is like "full speed ahead". That mini twist got me a bit shocked because from the main story pov it makes Chigaya portray the villain a lot more when it's just Kunihiro giving his stamp of approval and nothing nefarious is going on. That had me on the the of my seats lmao

Also I thought at first us punching Chigaya felt so unhinged and like I felt super bad to do that (even though none of that ends up happening) and this man says in his POV "I wouldn't mind letting her throw a punch or two." LIKE CALM DOWN GUYS

I can't believe I wrote all this for a 2d man that I said I would hate and now end up loving just a little more than Togo like... damn girl he got you goood. I really like it, to each their own, I think the POV helps a lot more understand him better and certain things make a little more sense.

Also IT Chigaya is super good looking or just him with his hair pulled back in a slight messy style like please... voltage ... give me more of that sprite please... I will suck your—

[septima-severa]

Thrawn x Dr Lani Kordes continuation...

... but it will still take me a lot of time before the story will be ready for public viewing. I even rewrote the epilogue from the preceding multichapter in the timeline, as it wouldn't probably make sense to keep the characters at the same military rank for the past decade. I'm still doing my research on Ufsa'mak'ro (by that I mean reading tons of other people's fanfics to get some grasp about that dude) as he will also make an appearance, and we are to move to Naporar - and that's a territory I know nothing about, so maybe... bear with me. And more Eli Vanto... probably will get to past Thranto, but we will see. Grysk seasoning also added to this stew, simmering on a low fire. It's bound to be a long journey.

In the meantime, though, enjoy the snippet here.

“Is the baby his?” he gestured towards your belly.

“Yes.”

“And the other one? The one travelling with you?”

Your patience wore thin with that question implying so many scenarios. You replied in Basic, hissing in irritation, “If you insinuate that I’ve been randomly abducting children on my way here, you are gravely mistaken, Eli’van’to. Rishmu is my daughter – the one I gave birth to aboard the Chimaera, to be precise. A simple genetic test will surely prove that I’m saying the truth,” you paused to take a deep breath before adding “And she wasn’t born out of wedlock.”

“Supreme Admiral Ar’alani will not be pleased with that information,” he muttered after a moment, his Basic heavily accented after so many years spent in here. His expression shifted, but you couldn’t say for sure what it meant.

“You may remember that I’m not a people-pleaser, Senior Commander,” you concluded.

“Indeed not.”

… That seemed to happen millennia ago but could as well be less than a day. When the door opened next, it was not the familiar face of Vanto that stared you down like a nasty pest that suddenly occurred on the pristine-clean ship. These eyes were distinctly Chiss, two burning embers burying into your soul, willing you to stand up from the cot and pay your respect to their owner. But you couldn’t. Not right then. Panting shallowly, you were so desperately trying to will the life growing inside your womb not to kick you too harshly. But it knew its mother was stressed; and was restless like never before. Not even when you had been chased around the outpost over a month prior when you had tried to restock on some food, and the tradesmen hadn’t liked your offer in Imperial credits. You could only cast a glance towards the female in white uniform and her companion.

It had to be a pitiful sight – a heavily pregnant alien in the brig, almost unable to move on her own accord.

“You said that she wasn’t that far along,” the one in black uniform said in a hushed tone.

“I wasn’t informed about any details, Officer Chaf’eere’safis,” the other snapped.

“She shouldn’t be in a brig in the first place, it’s not good for the child,” the one called Chaf’eere’safis bit back, making her superior growl in warning. Apparently, her behaviour bordered on insubordination.

With a hiss, you wrestled your weight to a sitting position, unable to do much else, and watched them curiously. Your guess was that the commander was indeed Supreme Admiral Ar’alani that Thrawn had given you a detailed description of, although of course, his knowledge had been outdated by a decade.

“Senior Lieutenant Eli’van’to says you can understand Cheunh,” the younger one approached you warily, making slow steps, her eyes wide. Like if you would lash on her any second… She kept her hands visible to you, as if to placate you, before she kneeled in front of your hunched form.

You gave her a nod.

“I’m Chief Medical Officer Chaf’eere’safis. And this is Supreme Admiral Ar’alani,” she gestured towards the other person staying at the entrance.

“Where is my daughter?” you asked slowly. It was more of a whisper, and drained you of energy quickly. When was the last time you had eaten?

[its-no-biggie]

gets reminded that mario and luigi partners in time exists > wow i really love the concept of adult characters interacting with their younger selves > remembers that i follow an artist who has a similar au for bsd > seems like a cool scenario to put all manner of blorbos in > current biggest interest is orv > thinks about yoohankim as kids > gets sad

anyway lets do it. orv epilogue spoilers ahead

okay first of all. canonically as kids we have: suicidal, possessed by an alternate future version of herself, and literally does not exist. so im gonna come right out the gate and say a mario and luigi-style time travel scenario is off the table just. logistically. and also thematically. you understand.

but luckily the scenario mechanic makes it pretty easy to do whatever you want, so we still have options. are the kids personalities extrapolated from who the characters are now, just younger? or are they based on what they were like at that age? (or what they thought they were like at that age?) do they have the memories of the original? all of them, or just up to that age? if not, would that affect their personality? are they based on/created from childhood memories, almost like an avatar? is it some kind of creature that transforms into a younger version of you? to what end? or is it a robot or doll created specifically for this scenario? and most importantly - how old are the kids?

so heres a potential situation - they randomly encounter a hidden scenario thats meant to test you in some way? i guess i dont really have an idea for a plot or arc yet so i have no idea what the clear condition would be but. hypothetical scenario that creates a younger version of you and forces you to interact with them until you achieve some personal growth. if you wanna get angsty with it, the best way would probably be something like, the kids have all your memories up to that age and you have to help them overcome their trauma (and therefore your own). so in this case the kids would probably be a bit older, like 10-12? i dont remember the exact timeline on the kdj stuff but im pretty sure that would be after his mothers book came out but before he started reading wos. its a liiiiittle older than i was thinking but i think its the perfect age for maximum emotional turmoil 👍

this scenario would obviously be hell for kim dokja specifically, but i think it also has interesting implications for yoo "literally didnt exist as a child" joonghyuk. yes kim dokja has to face a version of himself potentially dealing with the very fresh aftermath of the situation with his mother, but yoo joonghyuk has to face his own lack of identity pre scenarios. probably the more realistic scenario here is that he just doesnt get a kid version of him because he has no memories to base it off of, but what if he does anyway? a quiet, closed off kid with no memories or family to speak of. its just so sad....... admittedly i dont have a whole lot of ideas for han sooyoung here though. well. actually. quick han sooyoung tangent

<tangent>

now. at risk of sounding like i have no reading comprehension. i have to admit that i was never really clear on exactly what memories han sooyoung gave up to create 1863!hsy. because okay. han sooyoung regains her memories when an avatar disappears. and when 1863 disappears is when han sooyoung gains the memories of everything that happened pre scenarios, right? [its actually not at the same time in the slightest but im not here to complain about time travel in fiction or we'll be here all day. theyre presented at the same time so i think its fair to say theyre connected]

so to me that implies that han sooyoung previously had those memories and made 1863 out of them? but why would she do that??? shes pretty careless with her memories but i dont think shes THAT careless. plus she mentions fairly early on that sssss infinite regressor (or whatever its called - her "plagiarized" novel) was based on her dreams - which wouldnt really make sense for her to reference if she previously had memories of 1863 and then forgot them. and that would also create a weird loop where 1863 has memories of herself writing wos, which i dont think tracks because she herself was confused that someone else wasnt writing wos...... and we also know that if han sooyoungs avatars train then she gains the skills from it, so perhaps this is an extension of that? and she gains all of 1863s memories independently from whatever memory hsy gave her originally

once again obligatory "i havent read the back half of the novel in quite a while so i dont remember very clearly" - i could be way off base here because my first read through of anything is usually not very reliable. but the interpretation that makes the most sense to me is that we just dont know what memories she gave up. but it seems odd to me? to specifically mention that she gave up a lot of her memory and thats why 1863 went rogue? not to mention the ways 1863 is so different from hsy.......

</tangent>

ANYWAY the point of this whole tangent is that if the children are based on the memories they had at that age then child!han sooyoung would potentially have an important memory that ours is missing (because she gave it to 1863!hsy). BUT if theyre based on their existing childhood memories, then naturally she wouldnt. in fact, id wager that over the course of the novel han sooyoung has probably lost a lot of childhood memories - that could definitely be a source of angst. its different from yjh who had no say in his circumstances - hsy intentionally threw away important aspects of her childhood in order to survive the present. and these are the consequences - a child who is missing a lot of formative experiences and noteworthy memories. imagine coming face to face with a version of yourself completely distinct from the kid you know you used to be, even if you cant quite remember clearly anymore, and knowing that you have no one to blame but yourself...... ohhhhh i really like that.

lol apparently i had the least to say about kim dokja facing his past self head on - i guess he does do that several times in orv huh. (wait. oh my god. i didnt even think about the oldest dream...... ohhhh my god kim dokja....... like, okay, assuming this happens sometime in the middle of the novel he wouldnt know about the oldest dream but. i guess i failed to consider all the things about his past he might not want to address...... but if this kid hasnt started wos yet then the reader specific guilt would likely be less prevalent. but something to think about......) and in pursuit of a different angle on that struggle i stumbled into yoohans raging identity issues. incredible

omg do the kids have skills?????? well kim dokja has to have the fourth wall no matter what. and probably also orv, but at a lower level - i guess it depends on if he has memories of wos too...... wait holy shit. little kim dokja who has started reading wos....... meeting yjh in real life....... im gonna cry 😭😭 i guess idk how old kdj was when he started reading it - wasnt he in middle school? thats probably older than i wanna go. can you tell i wrote this out of order? anyway. young yjh would have whatever skills yjh started with in the 0th turn (so, not many), but he probably has high starting stats (its only natural). im sure han sooyoung has been writing since she was a kid so she would still have avatar (again at a lower level).

to take it in a different direction though, we could do more of like. a mini clone situation? similar setup but maybe instead of a personal growth scenario its like, take care of your younger self and make sure no harm comes to them for one week. something like that. but instead of who they were as kids its like if you hit each of them as they are right now with an age regression beam. definitely go younger with this one - maybe 7-8? admittedly i have very little concept of the developmental stages of kids. i dont want them to be too young though - they should have some independence but still be way too young for all the fighting. and if sys and lgy are like 10 then a couple years younger than that seems about right? omg i was just checking the wiki for character ages - i didnt realize hsy was 2 years younger than the other two...... she'll be so little....... well i could always make them all the same age but wheres the fun in that

so anyway, in this case they keep all their memories and maybe their skills? maybe only some of them, and scaled down of course. but theyre more emotional and less skilled. vulnerable. child!kdj definitely admires adult yjh more openly, child!hsy is a biter, child!yjh is. strikingly similar but a little more readable. this also has really fun potential if the group gets split up and the kids are paired off with a different adult...... and since the kids are accurate to who the adults are but with less emotional regulation and impulse control, there could be some really fun moments of. your true feelings get revealed without your consent...... ohhhh yeah. its all coming together

[penny-the-pissed-poltergeist]

Rwby volume 3 episode 3 rewatch thoughts, RWDE/Critical opinions inbound

.I've started skipping the intro because it's not nearly as good as the first 2

.Weiss being excited to see Winter would be cute if it wasnt for what happens later

.Weiss hitting Ruby doesn't feel nearly as bad as what happens later just because Ruby never had "abuse survivor" as part of her back story

.Winter she literally won, everyone misses a few strikes your just an unreasonable ass

.And Winter just hit Weiss over a tiny misunderstanding... I don't care that it's comedic, don't make jokes about characters who canonically survived abuse getting hit by people who should care about them, it's gross

.I can't trust Winter asking if Weiss is eating "properly" after she was hyper critical

.On a lighter note, Winter phrasing it as Ruby "taking an interest" in Weiss makes it sound like Winter think Ruby and Weiss are dating and that's really funny actually

.Winter why should your standards apply to sister's ro-actually considering how much of an OSHA violation that dorm is maybe her changing it would be for the best

.Like the drunk-o-vision on the Qrow POV

.Raven eavesdropping like always

.I love Qrow here but who doesn't?

.Atlas was always built up as hateable well IMO, it's just that I don't like how they demonize Ironwood way later

.The thing is I'm am 100% sure that your supposed to be rooting for Qrow because Winter is written to be a complete asshat in this episode

.I love Mercury randomly showing up and just immediately noping out of there

.I do like this but does have some of issues that a lot of later volume 4+ fights have like cutting a bit to much and being bit faster then it needed to be IMO

.The speed line shots well never no look out of place to me because the show never uses them after this season.

.Qrow is only person aside from Blake and Adam(?) to use aura slashes to my knowledge, so Blake must be leagues above her teammates on learning that stuff

.Qrow wins by calling Winter's dad (Jacques doesn't count)

.Qrow disliking Ironwood here feels more 100% more natural then in the "hating him so much he wants him dead" way later

.PENNY AND RUBY WAVE AWWWWWWW

.if they don't call back to "Did you miss me... No" in volume 10 we riot, and not just epilogue Qrow seem to not actually miss them that much

."If I was one of your men I'd shoot myself" I still one of the best lines in the show. But because I'm contractually obligated to defend Ironwood, I don't think firing on someone working for you after they destroy military property and attack a ally is unreasonable, like... at all.

.Qrow is being 100% based while he's complaining about his coworkers

.I love how this show set up a semi-romantic rivalry between Qrow and Winter and then did absolutely nothing with it when Winter showed up again! /s (This happened with Yang and Neo too, this show makes fun rivalries and then just forgets about them completely)

.The Oz gang was so good and it lasted for so little time ughhhhh

.Everything with this talking scene is a 10/10 minus besides like, Qrow's dialog being a bit over-explainy, but that's it

.I wish the later Grimm were less disappointing with how much they get built up

.I swear to god Ruby's eyes took out half of Cinders brain post volume-4, remember how clever she is here?

[carefulfears]

kae’s sunday fic recs <3

this week i’m sharing @gaycrouton’s “words of” series (words of love & words of lust), which each feature a chapter based on every letter of the alphabet! nicole writes everything from her fic to her meta to her tweets with nothing but earnest compassion, and whether she’s taking you through the most unimaginably dark upsetting shit you’ve ever read in your life or the filthiest smut, every word is from such a position of affection, her love for the characters and their’s for each other.

she had so much room to play in this series and it was always so much fun to see where her creativity went next!

my top 3 chapters of each:

words of love

- Supportive (desc: Mulder had never heard Scully get called Mrs. Spooky before.)

everything will always come back to squeeze, honestly, and “mrs. spooky” encapsulates the choices made in that episode, what they mean. association with mulder is inherently derogatory, inherently ridiculed, but for scully, it’s also tainted by misogyny; she has to be more careful, and she knows that, but she’s unwilling to sacrifice her convictions in order to cleave to authority.

when this one-shot picks up a year later, what stands out to me is like…mulder’s obliviousness 😭😭 mulder is extremely socially-aware, i don’t think he’s actually oblivious of much, but he can fall into a lil earnest delusion when it comes to scully, i feel like. i love the way nicole explores the differences in their exposure to the outside world consistently in her work.

(also, like i said on twitter, scully heard “mrs. spooky” and said BET!!!! that association doesn’t scare her.)

- Unforgettable (taking place during s8/s9)

“She had ghost cramps that night. The doctors said it was from the stress, she figured the baby was mourning with her.”

this one just really broke my heart, lol. i think this is my favorite use of monica in fic that i’ve read though, and how much it means to scully for her son to have a believer in his life.

- Epilogue (post-ghouli, jackson’s POV)

y’all know!! how i feel. jackson’s randomly surfacing birth parents are weepy and weird but they really love him, and that’s something.

the end of their story was always going to be through this kid’s eyes, where he ended up himself, and i love that it’s where this story ends as a well.

(the line about going through photos and samantha being referred to as his aunt, something more than an experiment to “more than 2 people.” yeah.)

words of lust

(my FAVORITEEEE)

- Once (post-IVF failure)

okay this chapter had me weeping in my office at work….i personally headcanon their first time as around the end of IVF and this was such a sad (but hopeful) view of it. so much heart as always.

- Quiver

i promised y’all a dom scully list and i’ll try to get one done next week but for now i offer you… ❤️

- Yours

i really loved this one, LET DANA SCULLY BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF PEOPLE!! you know she wants to!!!

don’t miss the epilogue! 😁

this is kinda out of it because i’m exhausted from traveling but i had the best time with these stories!! love y’all

[realfinemood]

Patch 5 Epilogue spoilers!

LAE'ZEL MY BELOVED!! Becoming the Comet in Orpheus' absence! Somehow being inspired by me of all people into doing diplomacy! Teaming up with the Githzerai!!!! Still planning on murdering the fuck out of Vlaakith! Planning on seeing her BFF again once said murder is finished! I'm so proud of her!!!

And in a massive amount of whiplash, I guess Gale is also here. As the god of ambition. And being fucking insufferable. At least I wasn't stuck with him AND ascended Astarion I suppose. They'd be a match made in hell. Thanks for deigning to grace us with your presence.

I did finally get to meet Tara though! Who is also right with me on not being able to fucking stand god Gale. Though ma'am it is not my fault that only the girls know how to make correct decisions when left to their own devices. She did agree with me on that though, and I will be meeting Gale's mom apparently! Brecca canonically has experience apologizing to mothers about their children's poor life choices so she's probably got this. (It was her own mother about herself and not "becoming an all powerful shithead" but still.)

Fading out of the Astarion romance epilogue (which works again yay!) and fading into Brecca wearing the exact clothes Astarion had been wearing. Cute.

Astarion is so ridiculously happy. And happy for everyone else too!! And also refusing to talk to anyone else besides complain loudly, but that's fine, not everyone likes parties babe. But please go talk to Boo though because apparently he has a bunch of ideas on how to solve the whole "curing vampirism" thing and Minsc is just stuck on the power of love solving everything.

Also yay a hug where he kneels instead of Brecca randomly become a tall person!!!

Sebastian sent a letter thanking me for seeing him as a person and excuse me as I go cry.

Love you too Barcus.

Shadowheart called me fat (okay sure "healthy") and then complained about the random food choices we made while camping. Ma'am how dare you, I am a halfling, I went out of my way to make sure I picked things that made some kind of sense as an actual meal. Except for that time we just drank 40 supplies worth of alcohol but, again, I am a halfling. But anyways I'm glad she's off fighting Sharrans with her girlfriend spying for her. And yay I got to belatedly give her a hug!

Yay Karlach actually going to get her engine fixed!!! I'm sad I couldn't say we would absolutely join the heist but also Withers did seem to be super hinting at some sort of DLC type thing so maybe??? But ma'am. Ma'am. My tiny self was the one carrying everyone's loot, let's not go rewriting history. Save that for my poor druid who has no strength and is constantly shoving her loot at Shadowheart to carry.

New Clyde for Karlach!

Wyll I sent you off to hell with much better clothes, what on earth are you wearing? Also, I multiclassed you with bard, how on earth did you become a ranger when you lost your warlock powers? (Also damn do you have a rosy view of how the Flaming Fist without Gortash are. I played a Flaming Fist character once. Gortash was absolutely not the only problem.)

The most on brand thing, Brecca failed the religion check to know who the fuck the musician was. Or clue into all the obvious hints. Weird that Withers apparently dragged some random dude to play music for us, oh well.

Also I googled "dnd god dark sun in white sky" and Cyric is the first result and if that's what this is supposed to be about that is honestly fucking hysterical for Brecca specifically. Can't escape that fucker in any universe apparently.

In conclusion, I can't believe they stole both my pets on top of not letting me adopt any tiefling children 0/10 worst game ever.

[storiesfromhalcyontale]

Epilogue 2: A sense of Normality

I woke up in my bed, the past couple of months have been somewhat normal I guess. Asriel went into therapy after what happened with Crooler, I guess the image of him stabbing Lagravis still hurts him. Me on the other hand, well I’ve been gradually reintegrating myself back into my normal life. Today was actually my first day back at school, which made me feel all kinds of emotions. I wondered if anybody asked where I was. I looked at my phone deciding to message Asriel.

6:50am Sho: What time will you be in? Asriel: I’ll be in by Period 2 at least. Sho: Alrighty :D. Asriel: I guess I’ll be seeing you Period 2 then Sho. Sho: I’ll make sure to tell Akemi this. Asriel: Thanks Sho. Sho: You're welcome Asriel :].

I stretched and jumped out of bed, putting on my usual clothes, my headphones and a beanie. I grabbed the satchel Laval had given me and grabbed the equipment I needed for the day. I looked at the lion emblem on it and smiled as the gold shined in the radiant sun. I wondered what Laval and Cragger were getting up to in Chima, it made me somewhat happy to know that they had each other. I rushed downstairs and toasted some bread while I hummed. I looked around and saw Grillby making coffee.

"Morning Sho." Grillby said with a smile.

"Morning Grillby." I replied, waiting for my toast to be well…toasted "I'm guessing you're at work today?"

"Yeah.." Grillby sighed, drinking his coffee in delight, "It's going to be a long day."

"Is it?" I grinned, "Well when my school begins job placements maybe I can come work for ya."

"Thanks Sho.." Grillby replied with contempt, "But you're still 16, you can't really bartend and cater drinks can you?"

"Well not really but I can learn." I sighed, looking down at the floor with guilt. "I'm sorry for not telling you about Laval and Cragger." Grillby sighed, putting his hand on my shoulder.

"Sho like we've talked about, me and sans understand why you didn't tell us."

"But I still feel bad, man…" I replied, "If I just told you maybe me and Asriel wouldn't have ended up in Chima… I dunno if I can ever forgive myself for what happened there..” Grillby looked at me then hugged me.

"Sho none of that was your fault. You were trying your best." I hugged Grillby back, soon pulling away once my toast popped out of the toaster. I put it on a plate and swabbed chocolate across the bread, sitting on the counter to eat it. There was a long silence, one that I didn't like.

"grillby's right kid." I looked at the archway and saw sans standing there. He had a caring look in his eyes, "Even if you made some mistakes, you took every opportunity to try to help them. even when you were in chima, you took every chance to get yourself and asriel home." Sans jumped up onto the counter and put a hand on my shoulder "that kid is much more noble. honestly, i'm proud of you." I smiled.

"Thanks sans. I really needed to hear that." I finished my toast and jumped off the counter, washing up my dish. I grabbed my satchel and headed for the door, "Well cya in a bit." I shut the door behind me and took a breath in, I put my headphones on and put on Could have been me by the struts. Today was gonna be a great day, I thought to myself as I hummed the melody of the song. No matter what happens.

<- Epilogue 1

This epilogue is the shortest thing I've written I think. But I don't really wanna talk about the chapter, I mean it's just feel good and that's it. Nah, I wanna talk about the fic as a whole. This fic actually means alot to me, I mean it's not everyday someone meets their best friend through something they've written do they? This person literally inspires me and it's amazing how me randomly coming up with an idea in an English Lesson and randomly checking my emails to see that they liked it meant alot at the time actually. Still does today to be honest.

Now that SFAR is fully posted I can actually get to writing new content for this account. Which will be exciting!!!!

[definitely-not-karen]

I just read a really really good transformers fanfiction and I loved it’s ending but I wanted to give like an epilogue so I’m writing one but I don’t think I’ll ever post it cause I’m too shy to ask for permission and I wouldn’t post it without permission.

It just feels weird to build upon someone else’s fan work even if there are not “rules” it still feels like a breach of manners to write an additional chapter to a story written by someone already. Like I know with fanfiction that is basically what we do but it’s different adding onto something where the person wrote it for fun and received no money even if what I’m writing is also for fun (and also not as well written I cannot emphasize enough how much I enjoyed this fic) and for no money and exposure.

Anyways I just got wrongfully terminated from my job for not undermining my beliefs and yes I am writing this epilogue to someone else’s story with this in mind and it’s only for me unless I randomly get the guts to ask this internet stranger a rude question that’s basically “hi I loved what you wrote and I wanna add onto it” which is objectively the right thing to do but the fic is almost a decade old and this person is definitely living their life and who am I a person sad about losing a job they loved to use that to justify causing potential harm onto another.

But if this somehow gets back around to this person I’ll never post this vent fic ever unless you explicitly say it’s fine and I for some reason want to share a transformers fanfiction im using to process how I was fired from my job for speaking out against genocide.

Here’s the fic by the way, I love it whenever I run into someone who likes writing stuff for First Aid my favourite transformer.

[transfemlogan]

https://www.tumblr.com/transfemlogan/728883764913176576/the-entire-point-of-the-asides-was-2-showcase?source=share

can u possibly expand on this post a bit more? im just a tad bit confused

I will try my best!

The Sanders Asides were "smaller episodes so you all didn't have to wait as long in-between the main Sanders Sides content! These "Sanders Asides" will still take place in the canon and chronology of the main series. They'll also allow us to explore other ideas that we otherwise might not have found a place for in the main narrative" (tweet)

&, for whatever reason, i cannot find the video, it might've been in a patreon stream(?), but he has also stated that they were episodes showcasing Thomas' and the sides' life Off-Screen. However, you don't really need anyone to say that, because if you watch the samller series, that's Literally what it is.

The asides are supposed to be disconnected from the main series. It's in the canonical timeline, but it's not Sanders Sides. It's additional content. It's sort of like watching Steven Universe Future, after Steven Universe, but also nothing like that.

Obviously, it's very obvious that it's Thomas' life off camera but for newer viewers it'll still be confusing. Imagine watching SUF, & then halfway through the series, it gets renamed to "Steven Universe", despite it not being... Steven Universe.

The Sanders Asides still have the title sequence that say "sanders asides". Imagine clicking what you presume to be Steven Universe, only for the title sequence to say "Steven Universe Future" and it to Be SUF, but Rebecca Sugar keeps calling it Steven Universe and acting like it's the main series, but it isn't. It's the epilogue. She also hasn't said why she changed the name.

Imagine if Toby Fox changed Deltarune's name to Undertale, despite explicitly saying it's Not Undertale. Imagine if everyone started calling Monster High G3 "Monster High G1". You'd be fucking confused!

Imagine watching a series on Youtube and the creator explicitly says "smaller episodes [...] in-between the main [...] content" only to turn around and start referring to it as the main content, when that was never what it was in the first place.

Now. I know why he changed it: because it stopped being "smaller episodes". It was never smaller episode, in the first place, but it especially isn't now. And it explores canonical narratives, that I promise you, they could've (and should've) explored in the Main Narrative (looking at you, WTIT).

That was the entire issue w/ the asides to begin with and something I criticised from the start, but that's not the point. Why the Hell would you Change the name of your side series to match up with the main series. & then not say anything. Like is he not thinking about new viewers? Does he only care about it being referred to as main series content? I'm lost & confused.

Watching a series that was full of vlog-like episodes & then half way through it switches POV & concept is ... WEIRD. You don't want to be reading a first person book that changes into third person, randomly, half way through the 2nd book, without warning.

I know it'll probably be fine in the end & its his series, who cares, & its not like Thomas actually gets any new viewers (/j), but it upsets me that the side series gets completely thrown out because Thomas simply Wants it to be called main series content.

[scalamore]

Thoughts on if YM will have its epilogue and special side stories adapted.

Based on the trends I've seen, it really depends on the manhwa team. Depending on the team, which ranges from " teamwork" to "dictatorship", will determine if a series gets additional chapters. Again, this depends on the publishing studio, the producer, the editor, the author/artists. No two manhwa teams are alike. We've heard of the nasty ones where artists are so overworked they end up hospitalized or requiring prolonged hiatus. Some allow their artists more frequent breaks, some don't.

But for the most part, the studio is the one who has the final say in if they will greenlight another season, or the bonus chapters. The studio tells the producer, who tells the in-charge people, who tells the editors, then the artist/authors. The author/artists are literally at the bottom of the totem pole, and depending on the team dynamic, have a limited persuasion power. (Some have more negotiation power though!)

Ultimately, it's the studio that decides and offers a contract for a story to continue. They set a guideline of how many panels should cover how many novel chapters, and the author/artist work together on that. No contract = no chapters. Period.

There's been stories of other series where the studio tells them one day via phone call the story will be axed, finish it up in 15 chapters or something. Which is not enough, ever.

But sometimes, maybe the studio offers a contract, and the artist declines because they want to focus on their health, they're tired of the series and want to move on, and want to leave it completed as the main story only. Being a artist is hard work, and if they're burnt out, then it's their choice to rest and move on, unfortunately.

An interesting case is that of WMMAP; at the end of the main story SPOON, the artist, said she would be back for the side stories. However, months of silence later, she published 20 chapters of a promotion for the King the Land drama. WMMAP manhwa ended 4/2022, and the King the Land manhwa serialized in 7/2023, and ended recently 9/2023. This suggests she was already working on it at least starting 1/2023. The interesting thing is in the King the Land bonus artist comments, she said that she's had plenty of offers to do another Rofan (romantic fantasy) genre webtoon, but she was hesitant because she wanted to do something new. So, did she sign a contract for the WMMAP extra stories? will she work on them now? or will she move on? Who knows.

Sometimes, the artist WANTS to continue a series, but the studio is too slow, or low-balls the offer, so the artist has to decline because they've already signed a contract with another series. So they're stuck. (Apparently this is what happened to Lucia, I did not personally verify this information)

With that said, will YM get extra chapters?

I get the sense that hayeon-nim and hyeyong-nim enjoy working on the series, and are willing to continue it. hayeon-nim seems to be happy enough working on the series.... Of course, they could always be saying that to be professional. But that's why I encourage readers to try to read officially on TAPPY and to say nice things when the artists post the 'notice' twitter posts of a new chapters: the more positive comments, the better.

.... So then assuming the artist/author wants to continue, then it depends on DAON, if they'll greenlight a season 4. , and after that, depending on Hayeon-nim's mood, and if she gets a good contract, has enough energy to do the epilogue and special chapters.

I HOPE.

My irrational fear is that the series will be canceled randomly, out of nowhere, but I try not to be pessimistic ^^; I'm still keeping an eagle eye for the first sign of the manhwa veering off into irreversible manhwa original territory with these upcoming chapters

[eiimeixi]

i hope no one minds if i yap, so i'll share my story

i didn't start out writing fanfiction specifically because of one person, but multiple people. i got inspired by the amount of people who put effort and dedication into their love and passion for the hobby and the characters

but there definitely was some fanfiction that completely altered my brain chemistry, forever. THAT I WILL NEVER GET TO REVISIT BECAUSE THEY'RE COMPLETELY GONE FROM THE INTERNET, ONLY BURNED INTO MY MEMORIES AND I'LL CARRY THEM ON TO MY GRAVE WITH NO ONE TO TELL BUT THE EARTH MIXED INTO MY ROTTING FLESH-- or ashes, depends

the first was a wattpad bokuaka fic i randomly found linked while looking at fanarts on google (please it was years ago)

the title was "Doctor's Orders" and the plot was basically bokuto was in a mental hospital? or asylum? or rehab im pretty sure for anger issues if i remember correctly, and his new doctor was akaashi. obviously, doctors and patients arent allowed to be involved in relationships with each other, but despite that they began slowly falling in love, helping bokuto overcome his anger issues. oh, of course they never acted upon their romantic feelings for each other in ways other than caring for each other. but they would get into small accidents that make it seem like they did something. WHICH IS IMPORTANT FOR THE PLOT. WHY? because shirabu finally released bokuto after deeming that he has healed, and so akaashi and bokuto can finally allow themselves to be in an official relationship!! so happy happy!! yeah, totally, until the cops came and arrested akaashi for grooming a patient that was "not yet released". yep. shirabu didn't actually sign the papers for releasing bokuto. he faked them! tricked them! tricked akaashi into getting arrested (there were cameras in the rehab facility that captured all of those little accidents AND THEY WERE ALL PLANNED BY SHIRABU) and tricked bokuto into thinking he was free for GOD KNOWS WHY??? I THINK I WAS TOO SHOCKED TO EVEN COMPREHEND WHY THE HELL SHIRABU DID THAT OR IT JUST GENUINELY WASNT STATED BUT DUDE I'M STILL NOT OVER IT. ESPECIALLY NOT WHEN YEARS PASSED AND BOKUTO WAS FINALLY RELEASE FOR REAL (dude he was actually healthy already when shirabu faked signing the release papers but idk that guy has a screw loose) AND DECIDED TO PAY A VISIT TO AKAASHI, ONLY TO FIND HIM ABSOLUTELY WRECKED. HE ADMITTED HE FORCED ALL OF THE GUYS TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM EVEN IF THEY DIDN'T WANT TO, ALL BECAUSE HE COULDN'T GET HIS AND BOKUTO'S FIRST TIME OUT OF HIS HEAD. HE WAS THAT WRECKED. AND HE MENTIONED ABOUT HOW HURT HE WAS THAT BOKUTO NEVER VISITED HIM IN ALL THOSE YEARS. I WAS IN TEARS?? EVEN MORE SO IN THE EPILOGUE THAT SHOWED WHAT WOULD'VE HAPPENED IF AKAASHI WASN'T ARRESTED AND THEY NAMED THEIR CHILD AFTER YACHI.

THAT WAS LIKE 2,3 YEARS AGO AND THE WOUND IS STILL VERY. VERY FRESH. I WILL NOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME GET OVER THAT FANFIC. i still mourn it every waking morning. because im very sure it's deleted and i don't even remember the author.

(please guys if you know what im talking about, cry with me)

the other fanfics were all written by melqiiuvi on ao3, an ex-skephalo writer that i GREATLY LOOK UP TO. THEIR WRITING STYLE IS SO GODLY AND ALL OF THEIR FICS COMPLETELY HAUNT ME.

THE ONE WHERE BAD WAS ALWAYS A TIME-TAKING FREAK WHO'D ALWAYS JOLT DOWN IMPORTANT DATES, DOWN TO THE EXACT TIME THINGS HAPPENED. UNTIL ONE NIGHT WHERE HE GOES TO A PARTY WHERE HIS SCHOOL YEAR-LONG CRUSH SKEPPY GOES AND THEY'RE DRUNK, AND END UP KISSING. AND KISSING. AND MAKING OUT. AND FOR THE FIRST TIME IN BAD'S LIFE, HE THINKS SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF NOT NEEDING TO WRITE DOWN THE EXACT AMOUNT OF TIMES THEY KISSED, WHEN EACH KISS HAPPENED, ECT ECT. AND JUST LEARN TO LIVE IN THE MOMENT

THE ONE WHERE SKEPPY HATES VALENTINES AND DOESN'T SEE THE POINT IN IT BUT HE LEARNS IT'S IMPORTANCE WHEN HE SEES HOW IMPORTANT IT IS FOR BAD

THE ONE WHERE SKEPPY WORKS AT A CAFE AND HE'S ONE OF THE BEST EMPLOYEES BUT WHENEVER BAD'S AROUND HE ACTS ALL CLUMSY AND SHIT TO GET HIS ATTENTION

THE ONE WHERE SKEPPY'S IN AN UNHAPPY RELATIONSHIP BUT HE KEEPS HER AROUND BECAUSE-- actually i dont remember, BUT WHEN HE FINDS OUT BAD HAS A CRUSH ON HIM HE TRIES HIS ABSOLUTE BEST TO PREVENT BAD INTO FALLING ANY FURTHER FOR HIM, TO SAVE HIM FROM HIMSELF. ONLY FOR SKEPPY TO FALL FOR BAD. LIKE. THE SCENE WHERE HIS GIRLFRIEND'S SITTING ON HIS LAP IN THE CAFETERIA AND TALKING TO HIM BUT SKEPPY CATCHES A GLANCE OF BAD SMILING FROM TABLES AWAY AND HE CAN'T STOP THE WIDE, GENUINE SMILE FROM TAKING OVER HIS FACE AND QUICKLY LOOKS TO HIS GIRLFRIEND TO MAKE IT SEEM LIKE HE WAS SMILING AT HER INSTEAD. THE LINE WHERE THE GIRL SWEARS SHE'S NEVER SEEN HIM SMILE SO GENUINE WITH HER. AND IT WASNT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE DIRECTED AT HER. GRJAJHWA

MOST IMPORTANTLY, THE ONE WHERE BAD HAS SYNESTHESIA AND SKEPPY'S A GUITARIST IM PRETTY SURE AND EVERYTIME HE STRUMS THE GUITAR, BAD SEES BLUE. at least i think.. i'm not very sure the memories i have of the plot are pretty vague BUT I DO VIVIDLY VIVIDLY REMEMBER EVERYTIME SKEPPY TALKED, BAD SAW YELLOW. AND A LINE ABOUT HOW BAD'S FAVORITE COLOR'S YELLOW NOW TOO.

ALL OF THEM. ALL OF THEM ARE DELETED BUT THEY'RE ON MEMENTOARCHIVE . ORG BUT I DONT FUCKING KNOW HOW TO DOWNLOAD THEM BECAUSE I KEEP GETTING REDIRECTED INTO A TIME-WASTER SCAM OF A WEBSITE

anyways yeah that's my story of anguish and endless mourning, please never delete your fics no matter how cringe they might seem to you, because some people might actually take comfort in them or it's their favorite fic and idk you may or may not have killed someone by deleting it, or have prevented a death by posting a fic you think's trashy, WHO KNOWS. they always say one man's trash is another man's treasure. always keep that in mind!

for everytime you feel your fic's cringe, remember you might've changed someone's life for uploading it.

just pls pls never delete. post them anonymously or orphan them, but pls never delete them. :((

the way I have heard so many talented fanfic writers say they started writing because they read someone else's fanfics that are so good they inspired them into becoming writers too? just proved my point that your writing is never 'in vain', even if you dislike it and think it could've been better, it's still good enough for someone out there that it becomes their source of inspiration and perhaps happiness. you'll never know.

but don't ever, ever belittle your own works. just because you don't like them, doesn't mean other people dislike them too. again, you'll never know. there could be someone out there who reread your works every day because those fics you wrote helped them escape reality for a while, they could be reading your works as a way to help get them through a hard time in their life. you'll never know.

your writing may have saved someone's life.

your writing may have inspired someone into pursuing their career and changing their life for the better.

several best selling authors started as fanfic writers, and the majority of fanfic writers started writing because they were inspired by someone's fanfics. you do the math.

your "silly fics" have permanent impact on this world, even if you think they're not good (they actually are good, I promise you, don't let your mind lie to you).

I mean ***I*** personally started writing my first fanfic about 7 years ago, and have been writing ever since, because I was inspired by my favorite fanfic writers. I still remember all the lines I like from those fics I read 7-8 years ago, I still think about those fics I read from 7-8 years ago and still remember the stories very well in my heart. I started writing because of them.

this blog would never have been created at all, if it weren't because of those fanfic writers whose works I read 7-8 years ago.

I wouldn't have so far written about 130,000 words this year alone, if it weren't because of those fanfic writers whose works I read 7-8 years ago.

to all the fanfic writers out there; your works inspired someone, your writing made a difference to someone's life.

[caribeandthebooks]

January 2024 Reading Wrap-Up

I read 4 books and got 5 kindle challenge achievements this month!

Now lets look at the breakdown :)

Reading Challenge Progress: I committed to reading 30 books in 2024 so currently I'm ahead by 2 books!

Top Genre read in January 2024: Young Adult

My first read for the year was Gallant by V.E. Schwab. Rating: 3.5/5

This has been on my TBR since it came out and Kindle's New Year Challenge: Goodreads Choice Award coaxed it out of the TBR jar.

I really like Schwab's writing and this author is, if nothing else, consistent. Which means that the books always land at ~3/5 stars for me. Loved the premise but the story did not deliver how I wanted it to....which is on-brand for my experience with Schwab lol.

Since this was my first Kindle book for the year I unlocked the Bookish achievement in the New Year Kindle Challenge. Light work, no reaction.

My options for this award were to either read Gallant or Yellowface. Gallant has been on the TBR longer but Yellowface is a guaranteed read for me this year. So I went with Gallant for this challenge.

Book #2 was Interesting Stories for Curious People by Bill O'Neill. Rating: 1.5/5

This was my first pluck out of the TBR jar! This book left me with more questions than answers. At the end of many of the stories I thought "Why introduce me to a vibe you can't maintain?" . If you're into (mostly North American) trivia or play games that use that type of trivia this might be of interest to you. It would have been nice if there was a variety in countries and non-North American cultures represented here.

At least I got something out of that read. I unlocked the Bookworm achievement in the New Year Kindle Challenge once I completed my second Kindle book of the year.

Book #3 was Kindred by Octavia E. Butler. Rating: 4/5

This book was also plucked out of the TBR jar and it was a page-turner! I liked that the main character isn't JUST a black slave. I see enough Black struggle in the media that I usually stay away from it in recreational media that I consume. This book gave what I think is a pretty accurate depiction of how a black person who didn't grow up in slavery would behave if they were flung back into that time randomly. I feel like the Epilogue could have given me a bit more "where are they now" but I understood why it didn't. This one is going in my favourite reads and diverse read tags (as soon as it gets out of the queue)

I unlocked the Resolution Keeper achievement in the New Year Kindle Challenge while reading my third book of the year.

Book #4 was The Lesbiana's Guide to Catholic School by Sonara Reyes. Rating: 4.5/5

Lets get 1 thing straight and 2 things gay: I was WAITING for my TBR jar to give me one of my highly anticipated reads. I love a queer YA book, they are SO adorable (the ones I've read at least) and the fact that the author is also a Latina queer who went to Catholic School? Chef's Kiss! This was a fun read for me as I expected. As an Afro-Latina and a baby polyglot I liked that they didn't do that weird "here's a Spanish word just 'cause I can" thing. The way the parents handled the situation was sloppy and tbh needed MUCH more nuance. I also wish we got more from her brother's point of view but I enjoyed it all the same, difficult topics and all. This one is going in my favourite reads and diverse read tags (as soon as it gets out of the queue)

I unlocked the Bibliophile achievement in the New Year Kindle Challenge once I completed my third Kindle book of the year.

And that's it! If you stuck around for the whole thing, thank you so much! I try to keep my review's spoiler free - be the good you want to see in the world, right?

See you next month and Happy Reading!!